A couple of years back, I went to a chiropractor. He asked me to get several x-rays of my back and neck before giving me adjustments. When I saw the x-rays, the chiropractor gave me a horrible diagnosis. I know about my scoliosis, in addition to that, he said I had 2 slip discs on my neck. I started getting adjustments immediately. He said I shouldn’t be carrying any loads with my condition.
I was so terrified. How can I not carry 20kg Nathan and give him the piggy-back rides that always made him laugh, connect with me and step out autism? How was I going to continue his journey to recovery when I could lose that very significant tool? How was I going to help him with his cerebral palsy challenges as he gets bigger and heavier and as I get older and weaker?
A pain in my back, that I never had before, kept getting worse as I imagined my spine and neck joins fusing every time I carried any amount of weight.
In a few days, I was crying about my predicament almost unable to do anything productive. One afternoon, I finally asked Juliet to massage my back. Luckily she has experience. As she massaged my back, she told me how tense a section was and hit the exact spot where most of my pain was coming from. “You mean you think the pain is from muscle tension and not from the spine?” I asked. She agreed and continued to massage as I continued to try to feel and analyse where the pain was coming from.
I believed that if the source of my pain was in my spine and due to my scoliosis, an inevitable disease would follow. However, if it was only a muscle tension, it would be a temporary and passing pain.
As Juliet continued to loosen the muscle tension, the pain was alleviated. I realised that it was only a muscle pain. It was most probably caused by the STRESS of seeing my x-rays being interpreted by “the expert” chiropractor, who couldn’t be wrong. As soon as I realised what caused my stress and that it “wasn’t real” but something that I had “made up”, I began to heal.
Though the chiropractor is an expert in his field. I have decided I am an expert on how my body feels, which in turn corresponds to my health.
Today I still give Nathan all the piggy back rides that we both enjoy. And I feel I don’t have to stop doing it until there’s a better reason to stop…like when he hits 30kg 😜
It helps a lot to stop and decide:
– Is the stress, be it real or something I made up in my mind, worth giving up my powers to heal?
– Can I adapt a different believe that will promote my healing.
Here’s a belief that is helping me in this journey:
– God made our bodies perfect. No matter what accident, injury, wrong medical or dietary decisions I have made in the past, our bodies will always move towards healing if we allow it too. All we have to do is support the healing.